Friday Night Road Trips

Advice From One Smart Lady

I remember Fridays when I was very young waiting impatiently for my Dad to come home from work. As I look back I marvel at my father’s stamina. We lived in the Germantown section of Philadelphia. He worked in North Wales, PA which was a little over 15 miles by car. Each day he drove 30 miles or more back and forth to his job. On Friday’s he drove home and loaded the car with my mother, my four siblings and myself, and retraced his route partially to take us to our grandfather’s store to do the grocery marketing.
I am absolutely floored by my father’s dedication to us. Remember he drove 30 miles that day back and forth from work. He then retraced a little over 13 miles of that trip to get to our grandparent’s home in Penllyn, PA. The blessing was our grandmother always had a meal waiting for us.
For me, the highlight of that trip was walking into my grandfather’s store, “Wilson’s Grocery Market”. It was a stucco and brick building at the end of their backyard.
In Front of Papa's Store - Wilson's Grocery Market

Aunts Ruby and Sissy (Grace) Wilson with my brother Eddie (Avon) and me the future One Smart Lady

I now realize it was there I received my baptism to be an entrepreneur. During the 50s and early 60s, people did not many supermarkets to choose from. They shopped in their neighborhoods at small family stores. The shelves were always fully stocked, waiting for the customers to come. I now understand the feeling as I built my store online, and now each day wait for my customers to come.
Unlike most online merchants, I have experienced the joy and pride of the waiting period. I enjoy the time I spend tweaking and looking for new products to add to my online shopping mall. Sales come in as people need what I sell. I understand that, and I have built the Pearline Shopping Mall with a strong foundation to withstand the wait.
There are preparations to make if you are looking to build your store online. If you have been watching the explosive growth of Amazon, eBay, Etsy, and Shopify, you must accept the reality, it is about “eCommerce”. I remember there was a movie “The Graduate” where the insider stressed “One word, Plastics”. Indeed he was right. Look at our world today, overwhelmed with plastic products.
I highly recommend you join me in learning how to bring your product and/or services offline and jump in with both feet and join the eCommerce wave. I have been actively and purposely learning eCommerce and Social Media Marketing from an awesome group of experts. Over the past ten years, I have mastered the art of blogging. I am now learning how to merge what I love, writing with my eCommerce ventures.
One of the questions I am sure to be asked, “What does this have to do with writing and publishing a book?” My answer, “Once your book is published, you have to market, advertise and sell it. Your book is now a product. You may also have a workshop or speech presentation attached to this book. You must learn about marketing funnels, autoresponders, and other tools.”
If you have any questions, please list them in the comments below so my answers will help others who may have the same question.

Habit #3: Keep Your Conscience Clear

Advice from One Smart Lady

Habit #3
Keep Your Conscience Clear

“Conscience can take us by the hand and lead us to God.”

“Conscience is rarely consistent or rational.”

“No one in his right mind should want to live without a conscience. In fact, there is a name for them and they are called ‘sociopaths’.”

True Guilt vs False Guilt

“True guilt seeks to put things right.” For example, true guilt manifests itself if you hurt someone, violated their rights, and you need to take responsibility for your actions. This is true guilt. False guilt is what we feel when no actual violation has occurred, but it is imagined or when we exaggerate a petty mistake we’ve made, or when we refuse to forgive ourselves even though we have been forgiven.

When Guilt Distorts

Even as I write this, I am questioning how this habit will be received by my non-Christians readers. I am questioning my right to give a report on this topic using Bible quotes and Christian ethics. Nevertheless, in 1 Peter 3:16 I am reminded to “keep a clear conscience so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.” My conviction in my belief and faith in Christ is closely connected to my conscience.

This verse in 1 Timothy foretold what we are experiencing today.

1 Timothy 4:1-2 “The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and follow deceiving spirits and things taught by demons. Such teaching come through hypocritical liars, whose consciences have been seared as with hot iron.”

There is clearly a connection between God’s conviction and our conscience. Hebrews 10:22…let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.”

Distorted False Guilt

We always hear the saying, “Let Your Conscience Be Your Guide.” According to Dr. Hart, that may not be necessarily a good thing to do. A false guilty conscience can lead to distress, depression, and even suicide. We may feel guilt when someone snubs us, leaving us wondering what ‘we’ did wrong. We get these guilty nagging negative thoughts when we do not call our parents or we do not give our children things they want and do not necessarily need.

To have clear conscience, we must learn to recognize healthy, true guilt and apply the right remedy. Sometimes the remedy calls for a simple apology or a confession that you did something wrong even if no one witnessed it.

How to Tell True from False Guilt

The feeling of guilt must be linked to a real, and not imagined, violation.

“Only real guilt can be forgiven.”

I bumped into a cabinet at a friend’s home and knocked over a curio. It fell to the floor and broke. I felt awful. I apologized and offered to replace it. I was forgiven for my carelessness.

The feeling of guilt must be appropriately proportioned to the violation.

“The seriousness of the guilt must always match the seriousness of the violation.”

If I carelessly bump into a cabinet at a friend’s home and a favorite curio or statuette falls and breaks. I feel sorrow and guilt about my carelessness. I apologize and I offer to replace it. The individual accepts my apology. If I continue to feel guilty and I continue to lose sleep over my carelessness, then I am operating under false guilt.

A young woman as a child was molested repeatedly by a family member. When she becomes of age or at a place in her life where she is able to tell someone, the response she receives is, “Why didn’t you tell me? Or Somebody?” This type of response causes false guilt. The young woman now blames herself for the molestation instead of the abuser.

The self-inflicted punishment does not match the crime.

Healing False Guilt

“When we are forgiven by God or someone else, we should be released from guilt feelings.”

Nevertheless, even when we are forgiven it is a challenge to get rid of the negative voices we hear in our mind. As a counselor, I pass on a practice that helps trick the mind to forget or get rid of the negative thought. As soon I recognize a negative thought entering my mind, I place my forefinger and middle on my forehead between my eyes, tap and say, “Cancel, Cancel.”

It works for me, and I have been given feedback by my clients, it worked for them.

Habit # 3-Having A Clear Conscience is a hard habit to truly understand and get a handle on. Yet, it is very clear to me, that having a healthy mind requires having a clear conscience. If not clear at all times, we need to understand and learn tools and methods to help adjust our thoughts and feelings about ourselves.

Next: How the Ten Habits Fit Together: Habit 4: Don’t Punish Yourself
Visit my Facebook page: @deborahisonesmartlady


One Smart Lady Recommends:

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start generating real income online literally as soon as this week. Vick Strizheus is my mentor and teacher in Social Media Marketing. Watch this video and learn strategies (100% Free Training).

Step Into Your Dream

Advice From One Smart Lady

Dreams can come true. What is it that you want to achieve?


  • Visualize it.
  • Dream About it.
  • Write about it.
  • Seek out people who are successfully doing what you want to do.
  • Build up a community of individuals who complement your talents and skills.
  • Develop programs that will help others grow their dreams.

Just Do It!

Take Massive Action!

Get It Done!



S.T.E.A.M. Ahead with Instagram and Facebook

Advice from One Smart Lady

Don't Miss Your Target

Don’t Miss Your TargeM


Notes from internet class (Note: I do not have steps for Twitter.)

Instagram and Facebook S.T.E.A.M Steps


  • 5-7 Posts Per Day
  • Picture Quotes
  • Lifestyle Pictures
  • Video/Clips (stories)
  • Livestream Videos
  • Monetization Posts (Links to your business/sale page)


  • Likes/Hearts, etc.
  • Shares
  • Comments
  • New Followers
  • Hashtags
  • Overall Growth


  • Comments
  • Direct Messages
  • Engage on other Posts
  • Respond to Tags
  • Respond to Hashtags


  • Facebook Ads
  • Instagram Ads
  • Instagram Shoutouts
  • Social Media profiles
  • Instagram Syndication
  • Cross Promote through Social Media (Pages/Groups)


  • Link to Bio/About You
  • Call to Action in Post Text
  • Call to Action in Pictures
  • Call to Action in Video
  • Link Posts with Call To Action
  • Free Offers for List Building (Focus on Building Relationships)

Snap Chat


  • 10-15 Posts
  • Pictures
  • Videos
  • Advice/Lifestyle


  • Views
  • Screenshots
  • # of Followers
  • Personal Messages


  • Call to Action Videos
  • Call to Action Pictures


  • Snapchat Shout Outs
  • Shapchat Links to what you are promoting


  • Make a message like the one I plan to use (it’s true).

“Just attended a mastermind where this guy made $1million this year. Interested in finding out how? Snap on this.”

This is just the tip of the iceberg in Social Media discipline. If you have any other things that have helped you focus, please put them in the comments. I’m sure others would love to learn from you.



Full S.T.E.A.M. Ahead

Paradise Valley Phoenix, Arizona

Paradise Valley
Phoenix, Arizona

I have been an entrepreneur for over 30 years now. I never get tired of saying that because it is a remarkable feat. Just think for more than three decades, I have been blessed and privileged to follow my dreams and passion in making a living for myself and my family. I have not always been as structured and organized as most people think, especially my clients. It is easy to be structured and organized when you have a system.

For the first 15 years, I was blessed to work with other entrepreneurs whose business and skills complemented what I was offering. I was the most successful when others marketed my computer training and programming expertise and services. I just had to show up. But then, I found I had a burning passion for doing something other than write code or drive 30 miles to train a classroom of people forced to learn the software package. Otherwise, they could not keep their jobs. Everything at that time was moving from mainframe computer to desktop. There is nothing harder than to teach adults who do not want to be taught. I stood over one woman who refused to touch the keyboard and taught using her computer as the training tool. She was a VP in HR and did not type.

Thank God, I had my passion, the love of writing and storytelling. I founded my publishing company, Gladstone Publishing Services in 1998. From that point on, until today, I have enjoyed living and working in the sweet spot. I love to write, and I love helping first-time and aspiring writers get their books in print. Until recently that was as far as I was willing and able to take them.

Until recently, marketing was not in my “wheelhouse” so I could only help my clients write, edit and finally get their book in print. My experience over the last two months investigating companies who teach social media marketing has led me to The 4 Percent Group. Through my association with them, I was able to the attend a marketing mastermind training session and three-day seminar in Phoenix.

A new internet company is launching a new online school that is not all hype, but will teach substance with usable content. I was blessed to sit through multiple audit sessions and learned Social Media tools to help me move my business to the next level up. I’ve opened my first operational online store “The Pearline Oyster Shopping Mall”. It took me three days to step through the process. I had attempted to do online sales through various sites but even with my programming skills was confused.

As a solopreneur, I also need to set doable action steps that will lead to attracting new clients and customers for my products and services. Since returning from Phoenix, I have begun a daily Morning Inspiration live feed on Facebook.

Don't Miss Your Target

Don’t Miss Your Target

S.T.E.A.M. method of taking control of your work day gives you the tools to stay focused and work consistently without wasting time and energy following weak sales and marketing practices. I also learned there is a difference between Sales and Marketing.

We always say, “Sales and Marketing.” But what we do not realize, sales does not come before marketing. As inexperienced entrepreneurs, we put all of our energy in the sales of the product or service. It is in the marketing where we build relationships with our targeted audience.

If you would learn more about how S.T.E.A.M. can be applied to your personal social media business, comment below and I will work with you, at no charge. What I learned about S.T.E.A.M. I received freely, and I gladly pass it on to you freely. In fact, our instructor challenged us to pass it on. I gave this information to a wonder woman I sat next to on my flight home. She was resistant to being on the internet but recognized its value for business.

I also ask you to please share this article with others who are new or struggling to find their way on social media. Learn how to build your personal traffic and followers, and not spend dollars chasing rabbits or shiny objects.


I will be Live On “Follow My Beat”

One Smart Lady Says

Just a short announcement. I will be interviewed on the “Follow My Beat” radiovision show hosted by Dan “Dan Dan” Shiver.  I will post more information about the show when I receive it.


I am also launching a new blog: Smart Lifestyle News As I discover tools, I will post articles in this new blog; especially social media tools writers, coaching and other entrepreneurs can use to market on the internet.

This is Day 15 of my 90 Day Challenge of Changing the Habits of My Thinking.

Be Blessed and Stay Focused.

Smart By Choice TV Interview by Host A'Drienne Dixon with Rev. Harold Sutton from One Smart Lady Productions on Vimeo.

During the November 15 pilot of Smart By Choice TV, Host A’Drienne Dixon had the pleasure of interviewing Pastor Harold Sutton about his new book – Do The Hard Thing “Train Up a Child”. For more information go to




Book Production and Protege Program

Gladstone Publishing Services