Habit 1: Seeing the Good in Others

Habits of the Mind - Dr. Archibald D. Hart

How the Ten Habits Fit Together

Here is the list of the Ten Habits which help us be the best that we can be, and live the life we desire to live and achieve God’s purpose in our life.

  1. See the good in others
  2. Give yourself permission to fail
  3. Keep your conscience clear
  4. Don’t punish yourself
  5. Value life’s little blessings
  6. Accentuate the positive
  7. Be the right sort of optimist
  8. Accept yourself for who you are
  9. Stay with reality
  10. Cherish God’s love and wisdom

Habit #1

See the Good in Others

 “In order to see the good in others, you must see the good in yourself.”

“Seeing the good in others has nothing to do with liking, but everything to do with loving.”

Matthew 5:44 says, “love your enemies.”

“We are required by God to accept people for what they are: the good, the bad, and the ugly.”

God has given us the capacity to love people who we may not necessarily like. It is a process, and will not be immediate.

Not Everyone Likes Me Either
and Not Everyone is My Friend

I remind myself that even though it seems on the outside, I have a lot of friends, I don’t. It’s true a lot of people like me, and there are also a lot of people who do not.

I thank God I have progressed and matured where being liked by everyone is no longer my priority. Being nice to everyone is until they give a reason to be cautious in how I deal with them.

This is especially true for clients and customers. As an entrepreneur, you come in contact with many different personalities. Because you are in business to earn an income, you have to adjust your interactions with them according to their needs for your products and services. When the project or sale ends, your client may become a closer acquaintance, even a friend. For me, I love building relationships with my clients. But not all clients feel the same as I do.

Some have decided to go their own way, and I had to learn to let them go. I use to suffer every time my relationship ended with my clients, because of the amount of time and effort I commit to a project. I feel the loss of the kinship/relationship built between us. I now understand, people are in my life to have their needs met, once those needs are met, they no longer need me. So you must learn to let them go when it’s time to part ways.

The Divine Formula

God did not ask us to change before He could love us.

If people are to change, it is most likely because we loved them first.

They may be totally unlikable, and the love we show them may be tough love, but nevertheless we show them, love.

Negative people will change a lot sooner if we do not make it a condition of our love. Hurt people especially need our love; God’s agape love.

 Four Key Steps

To Seeing the Good In Others


  1. Acknowledge your own un-loveliness.


  1. Set aside emotional reactions.


  1. Remember that every person is loved by God.


  1. Recognize your own need to be seen as a good person.

Next: How the Ten Habits Fit Together: Habit 2: Give Yourself Permission to Fail
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